How fast has the pace of your life gotten to be? Sometimes I feel like every time I think things can’t move at a faster or more overwhelming pace, the world somehow kicks into an even higher gear.
Sometimes the rush of getting things done can be a great thing.
Sometimes it can keep us from seeing other people at all. And when another person truly needs us to slow down enough to truly see and hear them, it can be devastating.
Added to that is the uncertainty we can often feel when interacting with a person with an intellectual disability. We worry we’ll say the wrong thing. We feel uncomfortable when we can’t immediately understand someone’s speech or expressions. We don’t know what to say or even how to be with someone we don’t understand or who may not understand us. So too often, we say nothing. We do nothing. We distance. We ignore, speak past, or worst of all, speak down to.
It's a very human thing to feel uncomfortable in these situations.
One of the simplest and most powerful things we can do is this: speak normally.
Make eye contact as you would with anyone else. Speak to the person, not about them as if they weren’t there. If the person is an adult, speak to them in the tone you would with any other adult, not as you would to a child.
Be patient. For some, it may take a while to respond, or they may struggle with their speech along the way. Be comfortable with some silence if they seem to be working on a response.
If you didn’t understand, know that it is okay to ask if the person can say something again and to let them know you really want to understand.
We all want to be seen, to be heard, to be understood, and to be known. When we slow down and work for normal conversations, it may not seem like much, but for the person we’re speaking with it may mean a moment of joy, understanding, and dignity.
It’s something for all of us to practice anyway. Slowing down. Speaking with kindness and respect. Listening deeply.
When we do, we create new paths together filled with hope for others and we develop opportunities for new and better relationships for ourselves along the way.
"Sometimes the rush of getting things done can be a great thing. Sometimes it can keep us from seeing other people at all. And when another person truly needs us to slow down enough to truly see and hear them, it can be devastating."
If you or your loved one wants joyful independence, which may include residential services, vocational training and job opportunities, and shared recreational avenues with peers…